How to break off Prince William’s engagement…

Would it be so wrong to give Prince William these as a pre- engagement gift?

Would he strut around Balmoral in them? And while having tea and crumpets with Harry and Kate, would he wave these around and say:”I’m gonna be Ki-ing. Nye-nye ne-nye-nye!”? For sure Kate would find this sort of behavior terribly unsexy, and break up with him on the spot,thereby, freeing him up for all the lovely single havaianistas/ almost future queens out there whose hearts were broken by the engagement rumours….
So for you, whose sparkly day has been tarnished by the news-I’m mailing one pair of Havaianas Cards to Prince William tomorrow!

XOXO,
sassy

Ay Caramba! Here’s what (I believe to be) the official response of Prince William to me:

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